About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
