I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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