So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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