Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
tell your sister to shave her snatch
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Randomize
