Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
That accounts for only three of the penises
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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