So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I think a kid would responsible me up
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize