Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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