Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Randomize
