Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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