I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
