We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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