the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
