But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I can't put those talents on a resume
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
