I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
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