Don't you send me to vm
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Randomize