At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I would fuck him just for his dog
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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