im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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