uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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