Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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