He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Randomize
