He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize
