I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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