She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
