Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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