You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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