Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
