Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Houston, we have a blender
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize