Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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