so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Randomize
