We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Randomize
