Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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