'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
it glows. i had to have it.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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