how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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