I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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