He is such a slut. More and more my type.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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