I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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