U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
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