I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Randomize
