it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
