Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
