maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
