when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
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