4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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