Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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