I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
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