with your own penis?
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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