i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
