I look better un-naked...
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
