Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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