If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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