it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Yo dont text me then not text me
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
