Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
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