what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize